Do you ever feel like you have been sitting on a plane taxiing forever and then it takes off when you least expect it and suddenly you’re not sure if you if you are ready for the journey ahead? Even if you know the destination will be worth it? Well, that’s me right now and I’m scared of flying.
Starting a new venture at the age of 52 can be scary for anyone but when you have spent most of your adult life sharing your everyday wobbles with the one person you can’t talk to ever again, you feel completely on your own. And that’s the hardest part of the journey. Going it alone. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so grateful to be going into business with an amazing bunch of like-minded people but not being able to ring , text or just talk to Tony, well it sucks.
Making plans without someone to boost your engine or bring you back down to earth really knocks your self-confidence. A power cut the other night made me feel so useless and stupidly nervous. The number of scented candles lit made the house look like a den of disrepute. Luckily I had what I consider a brainwave and googled ‘what to do if you get a power cut’. The ‘leccy company were very helpful and I was relieved I wasn’t the only home in the road to be plunged into darkness and perfumery. I know I wasn’t really on my own, 10 dogs would keep out the boogeymen but I was really unsettled. I woke up at 3 o’clock in the morning to Blackpool illuminations in the suburbs. Phew.
Learning to take off by oneself is all very well but it’s rather nice when the flightpath gets diverted a little, in this case the builders started. Actually having the other voices chattering around the place and other humans to discuss your ideas with is a welcome distraction. I might be feeling a little less enthused after 3 months of living in chaos but at least the days are getter longer and London is thinking of Spring. As Tony used to say when we started a journey ” do you want to go straight there or shall we take the scenic route?” I think I know which travel plan I’d rather take right now. So yes, I’m scared of flying but as long as I have a window seat, getting to my destination should be interesting.
“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear” (Dave Barry)
Widow plus woofs 