I decided this week that I needed a mind body overhaul. I’ve never been one of those people who likes living on their own so the last 10 months has led so some unhealthy choices creeping into my daily routine. As any widow or widower will tell you, the evenings are the worse. Without anyone to talk to about your day, it’s easy to miss a meal because eating alone is depressing or pour a few extra glasses just so you can block out the silence. Before you think I’m forgetting the dogs, I’m not. They mean the world to me and are a wonderful distraction but the conversation tends to be one sided.
The problem is that self-pity does nothing for self-esteem. I started to get more and more frustrated with my lack of oomph during the day which in turn made me dread the nights even more. In my quest to find ‘me’, I had taken a left turn. So I took one look in the proverbial mirror and waved goodbye to the pathos. I packed away the wine glass, did an online grocery shop and downloaded a meditation app onto my kindle. I never do anything by halves.
I think it’s working. I’m certainly sleeping better and emotionally I think I’m much calmer. I found a frankly moreish posh brand of ginger beer which floats my boat and, apart from my crisp addiction, I am eating much healthier. I’m even starting to concentrate on my meditation which, trust me when you have dogs, is not a simple task. You see, the only place I can find to practice this ancient art of oneness is on my bed. And the dogs love my bedroom. It is the only place in the house where Mum is sitting still long enough for them to relax, which means lying as close to her as feasibly possible. It’s a place of serenity..normally. However for some reason known only to them, they find my cross legged calmness the perfect time to clean their private parts or re enact Top Gun. I feel the path to inner peace may not be the quietest of journeys but I’ve never been one who likes travelling alone. I’ll just follow the paw prints…
“A dog can’t think that much about what he’s doing, he just does what feels right” (Barbara Kingsolver)
Widow plus woofs 