Welling up in all the wrong places

As week’s go, the past one has been pants. Those of you who are familiar with my weekly musings will no that I never, okay very very rarely, cry but by yesterday morning I was reduced to a blubbering wreck drenching Denis’ shoulder. Mentally, physically and emotionally, I had reached my limit hence the meltdown. The Gods had been out in full force and I was the target.

It all started on Sunday night when I heard Sherman barking on the pool deck. Now the last time he did this was when the pool sprung its first leak so having spent Lord-knows how long fixing all the other flipping fuites, you can understand why I pelted down the balcony staircase in a panic. Only this time it wasn’t what was coming out, it was what had got in – one of the magpies was frantically trying to get itself up and away but was too soaked to do so. I grabbed the net pole and managed to whisk the poor bird out and onto the grass before running inside to grab a blanket to dry it off. I say it as I have no idea how to sex a bird but Bert or maybe Skirt was still too wet to spread their wings so I waited until it waddled off exhaustedly to recover under some bushes. My hopes were raised the following morning when I couldn’t see any sign of feathers or bird but dashed a few minutes later when I found it dead in the pool with a broken neck. Why it got back in there I will never know. The more worrying thing was that the magpie couple built a nest in one of my neighbour’s trees and I could hear the chicks. A couple of days later I saw its other half searching the garden before flying away in the opposite direction from the babies and I haven’t heard or seen the magpie since. I buried the partner by the wall under the tree. I shouldn’t get so emotional about a wild bird but I did – losing a loved one is something I know too well.

After that, well the ball carried on rolling downhill. Having decided to separate myself from the visiting family so that they could have Mumo to themselves, I ended up basically living in isolation upstairs. What I thought would be quite fun and a chance to finish upholstering a long overdue chair job and sketch the village map that I’d promised the Mayor I’d do but hadn’t got round to doing ended up being a thoroughly miserable experience not least because I missed Mumo dreadfully and she’s a little under the weather at the moment. Having told Denis not to worry about me eating alone as he had a house-sitting to take care of and a chance to catch up with some very old but not seen for ages friends, my appetite went out the balcony doors along with my stomach. To put it another way, me and my loo got very intimate. And to add to my self-pitying, all the family splashing around the pool led to one of the patches splitting so I was back scuba side sticking mountains of glue in the watery depths and trying to avoid turning my unnaturally blonde hair emerald green. There so much sticky stuff down there now, the corner looks like someone’s being trying to create an ice sculpture – less Rodin and more Rodney.

The last sentence wouldn’t have tipped me over the edge if it wasn’t for the non-arrival of the man what was supposed to drill the water pipe. Once again. At least this time he did have the decency to ring me albeit several hours after the confirmed 8 a.m rendezvous. One of his drill bits had broken the day before and he was very very sorry and promised that he would do what he need to do this coming week. ASAP. Luckily for him, I’d already put snot and sobs all over D’s T-shirt so he didn’t have to experience a woman wailing down the phone.

Thankfully, I woke up this morning in a more positive frame of mind having spent last night chilling out as usual down at Le Jardin with mes amies. The pipe will be done this week and better still, Phil is coming to stay. I haven’t seen him since I left the UK all those years ago so can’t wait for an old friend’s hugs. If you don’t know who Phil is, you haven’t read my book have you? I have warned him about the heat, we are moving towards a chaleur with August beckoning and to bring long trousers for the evenings unless you want to keep the mosquito population rising. I might suggest sturdy shoes as well as the ground is rock-hard with the lack of rain, the break your ankle kind but with any luck and positive vibes and two fingers up the the Gods, we will be able to keep the flora and fauna blooming once the water bubbles up from the depths of the front lawn. And I will actually be able to have an actual swim in the pool instead of plugging its bottom corners. Who knows, maybe one day soon I’ll write a blog that doesn’t have a single mention of the bloody thing? That’d be enough to wipe the tears and put a smile on any girl’s face…

“When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.” (Franklin D. Roosevelt)

It’s the little things in life

You could be forgiven for thinking that spending every afternoon for the past week in the bloody pool whilst the sun turned your back into mahogany brown was peachy perfect – it wasn’t. But fingers crossed, I think I have finally found and plugged the teeny weeny hole in the liner. At the bottom of the pool. After God-knows how many tubes of glue bought and smeared around every seam along the walls and floor, the flippin’ fissure ended up being in one of the corners. Trust me, there is nothing fun about shoving mountains of goo underwater and for some reason unknown to man or woman, standing still in water whilst holding down a patch makes you need the loo every five minutes.

As mentioned above, the sun has come out for mid-July in full force with the thermometer barely dropping below 30 even at night. With the poor woofers flopped out in any available shade, I’ve taken to leaving the balcony doors open after sundown so they can sleep out on the terrace which of course they don’t do and instead choose to pant incessantly in the heat of my bedroom. And before anyone gets any funny ideas about a woman sleeping alone with her terrace vitres wide open, Neo may be getting older but he still has his full set of well-used teeth and Arry likes to spread himself out over the right hand side of my sheets.

At least now I can actually get on with finishing all the other half-done projects. Denis and I have begun putting the fixtures and fittings into the outdoor kitchen below my balcony although we still need to buy a fridge. We did try to find a second-hand one but a) they were all too big and b) all extremely expensive. Might as well buy a new one at that price and a guarantee to go with it. I did however purchase the perfect top for the piece of palm we found down by the river, a bargain at 15 euros. All that’s need is more gluing and it’ll be ready for morning coffee. Or relaxing by with a nice ice-cold beer at the end of a sweaty day.

Speaking of chilling out with a glass on a warm summer evening, the last couple of nights have been spent raising them in a toast to Denis who became a grandfather for the second time. Baby Ana was born in the wee hours of Thursday morning, healthily weighing in at 3.3 kilos. I haven’t had a chance to go and see her yet but parents Yoan and Inaya have been sending daily photos of their second daughter who I’m told looks much like her mother but Denis says looks like a newborn at the moment. I’m sure she’s absolutely gorgeous and will stay that way if I avoid holding her – babies tend to start screaming as soon as I pick them up. Must be the witch in me.

With all the pool plugging and baby gushing, I’m hoping next week will be a quiet one although with my sister and her girls arriving on Tuesday, I expect not. Mind you, I adore my nieces and so do the woofers so a little disturbance of my Zen would not be unwelcome. After the last couple of months of swearing and sighing over all things water-related, the sound of swimming and splashing around will be just what the doctor ordered and speaking of orders, the man with the drill pipe is coming on Saturday. I mean he did say he was coming at the beginning of the month which was two weeks ago but better late than never. Now, with luck and fingers permanently crossed, summer can finally begin…

“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.” (Sam Keen)

Ducking curveballs

Over a conversation with friends the other night, the subject of planning or not planning the future came up. Saba and Roy were on the ‘always good to plan ahead’ side whereas Denis and I were on the ‘live for today’ one. Apart from deciding what needs to be done garden-wise, we rarely make plans although I do keep a diary for things like medical appointments, weddings and such-like. Other people’s weddings, don’t get excited – we like our life just how it is.

And even if you could predict the future, life has a habit of throwing curveballs when you least expect them and forget to duck. Take last week’s weather for example – one day scorching hot and in the 30’s, the next thunderstorms and near flood conditions with temperatures 10 degrees lower. I had to dig out a winter jumper last night. And then there was what was supposed to be the grand pool refill but D got the wrong Saturday (it’s this coming one) so we wasted a whole day waiting for the man to show up which put me in a very grumpy mood but actually, even that worked out for the best. There’s still a small leak somewhere and I need to vacuum up all the sand the rain has dumped on the pool bed which is easier when it’s half empty. Such hiccups also gave me time to finish the petanque tent accessories although we are missing one cushion as the sewing machine decided to pack up.

My attempts at fixing the above contraption left me in a worse temper than that which comes as standard with the bloody pool so much so that I really didn’t want to go out last night to the annual fête in neighbouring Preixan – something I’d been looking forward to for months. However, not wanting to let Denis or our friends down, I reluctantly put on a happy face and my dancing shoes before popping over to my man’s place for a pre-boogie dinner. Well, it was bucketing down and as we sat on his terrace watching the black clouds sit overhead, the phone rang. Did we want to go over to Le Jardin instead? Apparently the crowds in Preixan had made parking near impossible and there had been a bit of trouble, fisticuff style the night before. So we did and what a fabulous night it turned out to be. Sometimes, what you don’t think you want turns out to be just what you needed.

And what do you know? It’s turned out nice again today. Bikini and shorts are back on and the woofers spread out under the trees instead of my feet. Time to do my best Esther Williams impression and find the pesky hole in the liner. I could leave it until tomorrow and have the help of D but tomorrow is another day and another curve ball to watch out for. Where’s my baseball mitt?…

“Forever is composed of nows.” (Emily Dickinson)

Pongy plums and precious pieces

Is it just me or has June been a ‘blink and you miss it’ kind of month? One minute we’re wearing woolies and the next, we’re already past the summer equinox. And if last week was anything to go by, it’s getting hot around here. Mind you we did have a cracking thunderstorm yesterday and I mean, cracking. The lightning was so loud even I jumped out of my chair and most of the woofers shot indoors as if someone had fired at them. I say most as Sherman pootled in after the rush wondering what all the fuss was about – probably too busy searching for hedgehog paw prints, he’s obsessed by the spiny species. and has the battle scars to prove it. There are an unusually high number of them around at the moment, I think a combination of May’s wet weather and the abundance of stinking, rooten plums lying waste under their trees might have something to do with it. Over the last couple of weeks, I must have picked over 10 kilos of the little red fruit and that’s just from one tree and only about a quarter cleared so far. Denis wants to make plum wine which judging by the freezer collection should keep us going until Doomsday and the garden has already got the fermenting process underway.

I for one, will not be indulging as I’m taking a break from alcoholic fruits for a bit. Between all the parties and dinner dates, I have been indulging a little too much so apart from the odd ‘lite’ beer which brother Simon refers to as ‘flaky’, I’m being a good girl. And now that we have finished the petanque area, a nice sit-down after work in the shade of the mini-pavilion with a cold brew is just the ticket. I started making the cushion covers for the seating yesterday, something that required a lesson from Mumo as to how the sewing machine worked – I haven’t used one since I was a teenager and that got me thrown out of Home Economics (yes kids, we really did learn things like that back in the day). Still, my first attempt wasn’t that bad although the finished product does have the circumference of a badly fried egg instead of a donut. At least my finished armchair looks better than how it started out and as usual, just as with the woofers, I have become a failed fosterer again. I just can’t bring myself to sell it so now it has joined the rest of my mis-matched furniture up in the apartment. I’ve begun re-upholstering another abandoned acquisition downstairs which of course will no doubt end up upstairs.

It’s just as well that this particular parlour piece will be the last for a while as I really have to start clearing up a bit before the family onslaught next month. The workshop still has a bits of wrought iron bench de-rusting in one corner and a dismantled mobylette in the other – the latter waiting for some very hard to find motor bits. Then there is the half-finished outdoor kitchen to complete and a bit of radiator painting in the newly-painted room at the top of the main house. With any luck, brother Moth will get out of Kenya safely tonight after the recent uprising there and arrive for his birthday on Thursday. I might have some special news to share with him by then but still staying schtum for now.

Speaking of birthdays, I just want to say a quick thank-you to those who messaged me on Thursday. Whilst I don’t see the 27th as his birthday anymore, to me Tony will always be a far too young 56, it’s heartwarming to know you all think of him too. I’m not sure he’d be thrilled about Liverpool being below Arsenal in the standings at present but he’d be happy his friends remember him each year. I really wish he was down here instead of up there, he really really liked plums…

“Gardeners, I think, dream bigger dreams than emperors.” (Mary Cantwell)

Chews and Hues

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, anyone who thinks sharing your life with 8 dogs is a blissful existence doesn’t know my woofers. One of them has munched through my phone charger cable. I can rule out Simi, she only gets out of bed for food and since Yogi Bear only has three teeth, I doubt he’s capable of chewing through anything. Coco Loco wouldn’t either, far too dangerous for his sensitive soul and as for Arry, he’d have eaten the whole thing including the plug it was attached to. That leaves four although Mo rarely goes into my bedroom and Neo prefers human legs to electrical outlets so the most likely culprit is either Alice or Sherman. But since I don’t have a handy DNA kit lying about, I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to buy another charger – Denis did his best to find one I could borrow to no avail, gone are the days when one cable fitted all, modern times hmm. Naturally, the only person I know with the same make and model of my phone is Callum and of course, I can’t call him obviously and even if someone could, he’s off line working on a farm somewhere in South Australia.

At least whoever did the crime waited until the best of the weekend was over, it’s been quite a social whirl over the last few days. Friday marked the start of Le Petit Bistrot season, Rouffiac’s weekly village get-together. And since it was the first night so to speak, there was a whole lot of cheek-kissing and “ça va” ‘s as friends re-acquainted themselves after their winter hibernation before sitting down to catch up over a few glasses and partake in a less than light repas of sausage stew. Good for lining the stomach I suppose. The evening would have been almost perfect if it wasn’t for any attempt at conversation being drowned out by an over-excitable and very loud big band musical performance and the absence of our Graham who could probably hear the trumpet player in Scotland. You are missed darling.

With the start of summer just around the corner and the weather finally starting to remember as such, it’s time to hang up the running shoes until the Autumn. As much as I love wheezing up the hills surrounding us, the mornings are now too hot for Alice, Arry and Sherman and my body needs its annual repose but it would be nice if I could use the pool. The less said about that bloody chamber the better although with any luck, it will be fit for purpose in a couple of weeks. I shall keep schtum about that until it happens. Needless to say however, I’m not one for idle pursuits, most of last week has been spent finishing off the top room in the big house – carrying pots of paint and ladders up and down that staircase should be an Olympic activity. The once dingy pink wallpapered bedroom is now a calm, cream brush and roller job – several different shades as I wanted to use up all the nearly-empty tins left in the garage but no-one seems to have notice the subtle changes in hues.

And it’s not just the room at the top looking bright and cheerful, the gardens are looking pretty spectacular at the moment – we can thank miserable wet May for that. Denis and I have also given my terrace a bit of a make-over including repotting my citrus trees and a spot of geranium buying. Mind you, I should have taken more care over my colour choices as the pink that was once up there is now everywhere down here. At least the potager is gorgeously green and full of summer salad additions. It’s just as well I don’t like beetroot. And now that the trees are all in full leaf, the woofers can lounge about in shady nooks to recharge their batteries – a couple are looking a little too lively this morning however…

“Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. Unless they eat your shoes, then your life is a little less whole.” (Unknown)

Close the book and step outside

We had a little celebration at Le Jardin last night – I finally finished the first draft of the Second Book! Obviously there’s a lot of tweaking to do before it is fit to be sent off to the possible publishers but I sent the last four chapters off to Sally editor last night with a note saying ‘take your time, I need a break’ only to write back this morning and ask her not to touch the last one as I decided to change the final paragraph. I was still scrawling ideas after midnight but I think I’ve got it so to speak. And then I can read a book, someone else’s – I can’t when I’m writing, it messes with my head.

It’s been that sort of week, virtually every day having a little ‘hip hip hooray’ . The pool appears to have stopped leaking although with the strong wind of late and occasional blasts of sunshine, there’s always going to be evaporation. I’m not filling it back up yet as no-one gets in until mid-June and it gives the remaining half of its contents a chance to warm up. Then, there’s our bumper crop of spinach in the potager – deliciously crisp greens and in a few days time, carrots. We won’t talk about my tomatoes versus Denis’, they are too pathetic to mention. Speaking of mellow fruitfulness and I don’t mean the burgeoning apricot, apple and plum trees, Sherman the Tank turned 3 years old on Thursday. The not so tiny bundle of puppy fur that Alice delivered in the palm of my hand has grown up into a gorgeously handsome, lovable and bloody big Border Terrier. He’s easily double the size of his mum although that’s never stopped her from giving him a good talking too when he and Arry get too rambunctious. The latter was back at the vets yesterday, the summer scratching has started but this visit came up with a possible cause for his itchies. It’s not enough to be allergic to over 450 different flora, fauna and foods; apparently he can add fungi as well. So we are starting a new treatment which apart from anything else, is much cheaper than the Cytopoint which doesn’t work. Saving a few pennies is enough to say ‘cheers’ to.

I don’t know where May went but hello summer and, if the météo is to be believed, the heat is returning. About flippin’ time. The winter wardrobe has been packed up and shoved under my bed and D and I have been slaving over the garden and courtyard for all to enjoy. We still have the petanque area to complete – up til now it has been too windy to get Graham’s donated marquee up and put gravel underneath it. But the courtyard is all neat and tidy, ready for those apéro evenings to come. TI’ve started undercoating the top bedroom walls in the main house, it’s taken me two weeks to get the several layers of wallpaper off them – whoever invented it was a sadist. I’ll be glad to finish the room, not just because of the endless up and down the hundred and one steps staircase – it’s horribly stuffy in there too. Still, if the fine weather promised is to come, I’d better get on with it – lazy days in the garden beckon.

So roll on summer and a chance to sit back with a book that isn’t mine and not a laptop in sight. Well, I’m sure it will get pulled out of its chamber – there’s always forgotten incidences suddenly scribbled on bits of paper in the middle of the night but with Le Bistrot about to open its doors for the season in a couple of weeks and the usual Saturday chill-out sessions with friends at Le Jardin (the bongo drum set last night had everyone swinging their toes and drumming tables), I’m ready to put the opus to bed for a while and slap on the sunscreen. Hello June…

“In early June the world of leaf and blade and flowers explodes, and every sunset is different.” (John Steinbeck)

Soap and sentiments

I can’t say I make it a habit of eating macarons in the shower but in my defence, I had originally thought that the tasty morsel was a fancy soap. My girl, Giselle, having just returned from Paris, had bought me a little gift box of what I assumed were edible concoctions until Denis mentioned something about soap. Considering we were hosting a dinner party at the time, I only had one ear to the conversation between him and Giselle;

“It’s a present for you, not Denis” Giselle said kissing me as usual on both cheeks,

“It must be soap then” Denis pouted

So I took the classy cadeau into the bathroom and left it on the vanity – it did smell deliciously perfumed.

It was only when I went to shower the following morning and thought it odd that the ‘soap’ didn’t have much froth and the scrubby underside was crumbling, that it dawned on me. I’d almost cleansed myself with a French cookie.

I blame my boob on lack of sleep. Between the bloody pool (let’s not go any further) and late nights tap tapping away at the final chapters for The Second Book, my usual eight hours slumber has been more like six. I don’t do well on six. I don’t do well either when the weather can’t make up its mind and the thermometer is like watching a carnival ride – up in the 20’s one minute and down in the teens the next. Then add spectacular storms from dusk til dawn. On the plus side, my veggie patch is bursting with carrots, onions, spinach and beans – even my tomato plants have started to show signs of actually growing (Denis are doing far better but July is still far away mister). On the downside, the pelouse now resembles a jungle but with the amount of rain we’ve had, it’s too wet to cut. So it was back to work indoors, namely pulling several layers of wallpaper off the walls of the only bedroom yet to be renovated. I’m sure it’s good for one’s thigh muscles hoofing up and down all those flights of stairs but I doubt all the dust my efforts are uncovering is. I need a holiday.

And next weekend, I hope to do be doing just that. Having a little break with Denis, thanks to Giselle who for some reason, likes the woofers and so offered to stay with them so D and I can have a getaway. Aside from my yearly visits to L’Horte, which was a home from home really, I haven’t had a vacation for almost ten years. 8 woofers tends to be a hindrance to such idealism.

Hence the dinner party on Friday evening. I wanted Giselle to meet Mumo so that there wouldn’t be a stranger living next door so to speak and invited a few others too – Giselle’s husband Jamel, her son Hugo and his girlfriend Marina, who happens to be Denis’ daughter. Having D’s family around as well as my mum wasn’t just about introductions and woofer cuddles, there are certain times of year that are easier to bear when you have friends and family with you. And whilst I have been incredibly lucky to have found a ‘second life’ and a ‘second love of my life’ here, there isn’t a day that goes past when I don’t still talk to Tony. 6 years seems like a long time but then again, not at all. As we raised a toast to my beautiful T, Denis whispered to me how proud he thought T would be of me. I think he would be but I bet he is still laughing in the aisles over my mushy macaron mistake…

“What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul “(Yiddish Proverb)

Where the wind doth blow

For those who might be thinking life down here is all sunshine and roses, there is one weather phenomenon that an immobilier’s blurb would leave out. Aude is one of the, if not the most, windy departments in France. And when it doth blow, it bloweth hard and makes everyone feel miserable – the sound of its haunting wail as it rages across the land is known to affect one’s sanity. At this time of year, the Tramontane that pushes its way through the gap between the Pyrénées and the Massif Central at speed of around 60 kms and hour and we got the full force of it last week. Luckily, none of the trees fell down although I have had to spend most of this morning clearing the aftermath of flora and fauna from the pool. I shall not mention the bloody pool again, we are not on friendly terms.

Since working outside was inadvisable unless you wanted a natural face-lift, the week was spent finishing off all the renovation bits and bobs I’ve scattered between the two houses and the garage. Of course, this hasn’t stopped me from adding more to the pile – Denis and I went off for a little forage down by the river to find any remnants left over from a large palm tree clearing operation. Bits of tree trunks are now about to enter a new life as corner tables in what will be a tented seating area next to the new petanque ground. Mercifully, we haven’t put the marque up yet as it would probably be in Spain by now. Working with wood always lifts the happy hormones even when you’re stupid enough to use the sander when there’s a helluva hooley swirling around.

Braving the elements over the past few days hasn’t been the only test of courage – Arry, Alice, Sherman and I faced our demon together on our regular Tuesday running route. There he was, the great big fluffball behind the fence once more allowing us safe passage although Arry couldn’t resist a couple of face-to face barks across the divide. As much as I knew the owner had taken care of the hole in the enclosure, it was still a ‘shall I shan’t I’ decision to run that way again. I really should try and be more like my half-brained German Shepherd, his mind empties two seconds after an event. That being said, the view from the top of our run makes any fleeting thoughts of staying under the bed covers worth the brief lip-biting hesitations.

With any luck, the end of April will take the blustery thermals with it and May will bring sunshine and occasional showers. Yes, rain. Not that I like getting soaked but the garden does and with the cost of refilling the pool uppermost in one’s mind, a bit of free water wouldn’t go amiss. My veggie patch is suffering and I hate dragging the hose around especially as Arry views any spray of water as an amusement park offering and one of us ends up wetter than the other. At least if the Gods are feeling benevolent, they’ll add a bit of summer warmth to the mix – such activity can be tolerated in shorts and a bikini. And they can take their tramontane and blow it somewhere else, we like being a happy little village down here…

“The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.” (William Arthur Ward)

Witchy work

I feel I should title this blog “40 days and 40 nights” judging by the amount of rain we had for the first 4 days and 4 nights last week. And just as I was getting on top of all the water under the pool liner. Still, I would like to thank Sophy and Sean for their lovely gift on leaving our little part of France on Wednesday – blue skies and 30 degrees ensued. I’m back in my bikini once more and the woofers flopped out on the cool apartment tiles. The bloody pool is almost empty so with any luck and a few more days without pluie, Denis and I can finish the last bit of reparation around it’s drain and start refilling the vast abyss.

Having one hole to empty of water is one thing, finding a possible two or three in the front garden that may well hold the precious liquid is another altogether. We had a visit from the long-awaited water diviner this morning. Since finding out that quite a few of the neighbouring houses have ‘natural’ wells, I was pretty sure we must too since the underground source comes directly from the River Aude at the bottom of the village. Rashid (him who is partnered with D’s niece Stephanie) knew an old man in Preixan who is just that – a water diviner or sourcier. Along with his son, the Monsieur found not one but 5 locations in the garden, all pretty much where I thought they’d be. It’s fascinating to watch as the rods move about and then cross over each other when water is below and before you think it’s all hooplah, I had a go and got the same result. It is a really weird feeling when you get close to the ‘x’, a sort of mild buzz goes through your hands up up your arms. Well, for me anyway, Mumo didn’t feel a thing when she tried – must be the witch in me. Now all we have to do is get clearance from the Mayor and then a massive drill will make a great big hole 15 metres down. I’m leaving the buttering up to Denis, he and the afore-mentioned are great friends. Always helps.

What with all the spinach and carrots I’ve just planted out in the potager, I’m going to need a ‘free’ flow of eau. Yesterday evening I put all my little shoots in to their new home, not quite in a straight line as I had been instructed to do by you know who but I don’t suppose the veggies mind. In fact, the weird weather of late might give them a boost as it has for all the fruit trees – plums, apricots, the dreaded figs of course and grapes. Yes, for the first time since I put it in the ground three years ago, my grapevine is bursting with little bundles. Hardly enough to make a bottle of wine but hey, who knows? Domain Stewart may be the next chapter in my new life. Or maybe I’ll be the next great graffiti artist – I finally finished the tractor shed wall and hung up my beautiful wrought iron frames over my brush work. I was rather pleased with my efforts until Stephanie remarked that the paintings looked better with the frames than without.

Speaking of chapters, Sally editor has sent back the last lot and a note to say how good they were – high praise indeed as she usually covers most of my writings in red ink. A pat on the back is enough to drive me forward and finish the last four before the summer. Then, as opuses (or is opii?) go – I’ll leave both books to the hands of the experts and keep my fingers crossed. By that time, we might just have a well for me to make a wish…

“In time and with water everything changes.” ( Leonardo da Vinci)

Tractors and tomatoes

What a drizzly cold day it is today. It actually feels like February even though we are almost at the end of the month – one that has, so far, been more balmy than brrr. Denis reckons we are in for a nasty start to Spring which I really hope isn’t the case as the garden is definitely thinking about all things bright and beautiful. My little serre is busy producing tiny spinach and salad shoots and I’ve relocated the infant carrots to the makeshift nursery beside it. Graham donated one of those plastic covered clothes rail thingies which Denis ingeniously lay flat with zipper side up and dumped a few inches of fertile earth into its middle. This has also given me space to hatch my competition entries. Yes, the tournament of the tomatoes has begun. D has his contestants at his house whilst mine are tucked away in the sweaty confines of the poly tunnel. Naturally, I did as was decided and carefully poked 3 or 4 minute seeds into each hole – 30 of each type as per the rules whilst Denis just scattered his lot willy-nilly into pots. I’m taking the scientific route, he isn’t. July is the deadline for showing off our prize toms and Saba will be the judge. My fellow cheval du feu.

Working outside in mostly dry conditions has been just the ticket for blowing the cobwebs from my sleep-deprived grey cells. I finally managed to get 4 chapters off to Sally having nailed myself to the laptop every night. I do wish my writing muse had a bit of respect for my necessary 8 hours deep snoozing, she seems to have an aversion for working during the daylight ones. Still I’m over half-way, less the re-writes which my editor has a fondness for so I’m shooting for that distant last line one one exhausting evening at a time.

The past week wasn’t just about punishing my mentals, D and I finally managed to move Callum’s beloved Massey-Ferguson out of the car port and into its new home in the tractor shed. Its only taken 3 years to get it the 100 metres or so from the front to the back of the garden; one because we had to build the shed, two as we had to remove the giant fig root from its lodgings under the building’s roof and three, the little red tractor doesn’t go vroom. It hasn’t gone vroom since the day Callum pulled it out of the river after the L’Horte flood of 2018. The battered old girl needs a lot of fixing up as well as a couple of new back tyres. Anyway, we cabled her up to the back of the blue ride-on mower and with me driving and Denis guiding, heaved her surprising weightiness the short distance betwixt the two abodes. D was very impressed with my skills at getting both machines out of the mud half way down the back, I may have once been a city girl but those heady holidays spent at the former family homestead that was L’Horte gave me an education in manoeuvring motorised vehicles across mulchy meadows.

At least that was one thing ticked off the very long list of ‘must do’ chores, actually I managed to highlight another couple too. I made it through the annual vaccinations of Neo, Mo Cridhe and Coco Loco unscathed thanks to D’s help and very gentle young vet recently added to the clinic’s practice. She wasn’t the slightest put off by Mo’s eyeballing and Neo was a complete lamb, he didn’t even mind her cutting his back dew claws – something I hate doing as its like playing Russian Roulette with his ‘will I won’t I bite’ looks. And speaking of bites, I had a visit to the dentist so she could check on my new teeth. One in which she told me I wasn’t cleaning my extortionately expensive purchases properly and I needed to buy one of those dental water spray thingies. Which I dutifully did and managed to douse more of the bathroom walls than those inside my mouth. They’re quite powerful little machines you know? Mind you, if Denis thinks showing his bottom to his tomatoes will make them turn red, my soon-to- be even more dazzling dentures will give my lot sunburn…

“A tomato may be a fruit, but it is a singular fruit. A savory fruit. A fruit that has ambitions far beyond the ambitions of other fruits” (E. Lockhart)