motherhood – Page 2 – Widow plus woofs

I was absent-mindedly folding Callum’s laundry this morning when a thought struck me as to how normal the action felt. Except that I’ve never folded his laundry, Tony always did it and let’s face it, my son has been looking after himself ever since his dad died. Yet, it was a nice feeling, being ‘mum’ again and taking care of our boy especially as our relationship is usually the other way around – he gives much better advice for a start. Thanks to him, I’ve been in a clearer state of mind over the past week and I no longer have a leaky roof. Mind you, the latter did give me a fright, seeing Callum wandering across the tiles like a beachcomber.

The recent weather could well have something to do with my mellow mood too. The start of February and it’s sunny. Not very warm but if you stand where the rays hit, it’s almost Spring-like. And with us being one month closer to a new season, everyone is busy doing something and I’m back in the garden again having sent off The First Book – the second would have gone with the first but I’ve managed to save several chapter drafts so I don’t know which ones are the right ones so that’ll be tonight’s headache. I’ve finished my kitchen chairs, which I’m ridiculously pleased about, less so regarding the dressing table I’m still working on but outside one must be whilst the sun shines. Of course, anything to do with the pool has had its hiccups, as soon as Denis got in to remove the old liner, we had back to back nights of pouring rain so the bloody thing kept filling up instead of draining out its last vestiges of algae-ridden water. Still, whilst he was deep in wellies trying to fish out toads, I sorted out plantings in the serre which smells lovely by the way – I’m assured that dried bay leaves and peppercorns keep the rodents away.

Speaking of rogue mammals, I took Arry to the clinic on Tuesday for his hydrotherapy session – his first with this particular practice and I have a feeling, his last. The unfortunate new-qualified vet was subjected to 10 minutes of non-stop ‘singing’ – I did warn her if you remember that ear defenders would be useful when she made the appointment, I should have added a raincoat as well seeing the amount of water he sprayed the room with. Life with my crazy german Shepherd is never dull, embarrassing yes but like my incredible son, he knows how to lift the clouds and add sunshine. And he generally doesn’t need me to do his laundry, just towels…

“While it is February one can taste the full joys of anticipation. Spring stands at the gate with her finger on the latch.” (Patience Strong)

Apparently, I caused quite a few heads to turn earlier in the week. The sight of a 50-something blonde wearing torn jeans and work boots, running through the arrivals area in Toulouse airport was, according to Callum, quite a sight but I wasn’t half glad to leap into his arms. Poor thing probably didn’t need to be squeezed so hard, 20 plus hours in an aeroplane suffering from altitude sickness (the meds didn’t work this time) and feeling totally exhausted – all he wanted was a shower and his bed. But my gorgeous boy is home and after a decent rest, back doing what he does best – giving Mum hugs and stripping paint off the main staircase. The latter however, has now put him back under the covers having, I think, inhaled too much dust even with that Darth Vader like mask on. Or perhaps climbing up Bugerach – not my idea of a relaxing day out if you remember that blog.

Cal wasn’t the only one to return to the nest last week, my little brother Moth flew in from Kenya on Thursday. Now, suddenly the homestead is full of activity, the sound of sanders and drills mixed with an eclectic choice of radio tunes makes everything feel almost normal again. Denis said watching the four of us (Louis is still here) reminded him of a beehive, always on the move for something that needs doing. Considering how emotionally and physically draining the last months have been, getting back into busy mode is perfect therapy. So much so, I’ve finally put down the proverbial pen, having finished the latest draft of The Second Book and re-written a large chunk of The First – both will be soon off to a good friend in the publishing business to be polished for presentation. After four years of tap tapping away, I’m glad to see the back of the opuses for a while although part of me still wants to fiddle with them some more. It’s an annoying habit of mine, I can’t seem to stop and just put my feet up. Denis even installed my old TV ( a bit on the small side he thinks) in my lounge so I could watch the French news channels (important for one who is applying for citizenship at the end of the year) but I the only time I stand still long enough to watch it is with my morning coffee. And I only have so much concentration which is required when attempting to understand politics in any language. Callum tells me such twitchiness is just one of my many ‘quirks’ but he loves me anyway. Over dinner with friends the other night, I was asked what I did to relax. I run I replied.

I box too although we’ve needed to move my heavy punching bag out of the room downstairs that Mumo is using as the nurses kept having to dodge around it. For now, it’s hanging in the alcove below me which is spacious enough, if not a little cold. At least it’s in a covered area and out of the wind that is currently pestering us but I’m not used to kicking and sparring with quite so many clothes on let alone trainers. I don’t know if the restlessness inside me will ever abate but as long as I’ve got something on my feet and they’re moving- I’m as close to relaxation as I can get. And a bloody beautiful boy to smother…

“A bee is never as busy as it seems; it’s just that it can’t buzz any slower.” ( Kin Hubbard)